Well, as promised, here they are:
Here
The hair fell away from the wall
unfeeling, dead.
restless.
unrelenting restlessness.
the hole closing and a piercing silence;
ignored, the sunbeams screamed,
halting at the feet.
the summer stagnated inside the room
away from it, he grew stronger as he stood.
distracted, he ignored the bright valleys.
he glared through the cloudless sky.
to the moon last night
waking up, a new day;
a nothing eternity.
feet, smile, back, moonbeams
moon dark raindrop
dark empty chilled nothing
them.
together.
again.
a certain book
And it came to pass
25 times
on every page
2700
pages to go
you do the math.
I'll waste my time
doing something else
Shadows of nothing (thanks to Alexandra Reijentes for the first line)
snowflakes staple the minutes together
an eternity
unwinding before the eyes
of an uninvited guest
welcomed, as any other
into the audience of one
gazing up
looking
up
snowflakes stars sun clouds moon darkness
nothing.
vast abyss
gazing up
looking
up
falling shooting shining moving rising shrouding
nothing.
absolutely nothing.
and
you're
almost
g o n e
Friday, August 21, 2009
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Just Sayin...
So I'm in the process of getting all moved in. Let me rephrase that. I technically got back to SLC on Sunday night, but I am only about halfway through unpacking due to the size of my closet and my lack of a dresser, which I'm in the process of trying to fix. Yesterday I purchased a mattress, box spring, and rolling frame for my bed, all for $75! Lauren helped me put it together last night, and after putting my old black extra long dorm sheets on the box spring and mattress, I threw my feather mattress on top of that and Voila! I now have a bed! I must admit though, after sleeping on the top bunk for about 8 years, then lofting my bed for two years in the dorms, sleeping on the top of a triple bunk last summer (until i broke my arm, which made climbing that REALLY difficult), and then sleeping on the top bunk above Loni this summer, sleeping on a normal(ish) bed feels really strange. I feel like at least there should be a shadow of a bunk above me or something. Haha. I am really surprised by this bed though. I really like it. No stains or smells or anything and for $75! It's amazingly comfortable and I was really sad to have to actually get up this morning, which is a good sign for the bed (the comfort issue), but not necessarily for me the morning after a late night of studying! Oh well.
I am also enjoying cooking for myself, though I've discovered it's really hard to just cook a single serving for yourself and our fridge is still pretty bare. That's ok though. I think the hardest thing of this whole situation is that Landon's car is broken and he's thinking it will be a better idea to just get a new one than fix his old one...again. So considering he can't really afford a car right now, he's biking to work, which is giving him crazy strong calf muscles (which he LOVES:) and he's saving beaucoup dollars on gas, but that mean's I have to get creative for how to actually GET the furniture I need. Lauren's really nice and willing to help me out, seeing as she has a car, but hers is pretty small. Luckily, Bryant lent his car to Landon yesterday (which is an awesome SUV, good story, another time) and we used it to pick up my bed which was REALLY nice. So now I'll just have to be slightly creative for the rest of my stuff. I'll figure it out...somehow.
So the real reason I posted this was to say sit tight and stay tuned. The other night I wrote some poetry, which I literally haven't done in over a year, but something came over me and it just kind of happened. I wanted to put it on here, but unfortunately, we don't have internet at our house yet. So this is the second time I have come to RoCo with the intention of putting it on here and forgetting to bring my notebook. Fml in a small way.
However, I really would like some feedback on these poems (3 total) as they are the first I have written in a long time. I used some writing exercises as a springboard and then things just started happening. Exciting, right? So the first is from this exercise called Angel/Devil where you take a poem that's already written (by you or otherwise) and try to write the exact opposite of it, hence the angel/devil name. I haven't yet decided whether I'll put up the angel version from which I drew my devil poem. I'm kind of thinking maybe not, because it might be distracting, since I don't particularly care for feedback on that one. The second is a cynical bit on a particular book. If you know anything about that book, you'll recognize it. If you don't, that's fine. You'll be blissfully unaware. The third is another exercise. I don't remember what it's called, but you use the first line from another poem (famous or not) for your starting line, and go from there. I don't know if that equals plaigerism, but I'm hoping not, because it's a great springboard; you can go a COMPLETELY different direction than what's originally written. So stay tuned for those. I'm not sure when exactly I'll get them up, but hopefully soon.
On another note, I'm rethinking the direction this blog will take. I think it will become much more of a writing blog, looking for any sort of feedback, than just me bouncing my random thoughts on here. I originally started it to document some of my adventures in Zion, but I left out some key things, like the Narrows, Cable Mountain, Angel's Landing, the RATTLESNAKE, etc. I think I remembered to recount the accidental heatstroke incident, although I guess every case of heatstroke should be accidental. Sometimes redundancy is completely pointless which redundancy sometimes is. :)
Anyway, writing. Creatively. That's the plan. With the occasional rant. Comprennez? Alrighty, stay tuned!
I am also enjoying cooking for myself, though I've discovered it's really hard to just cook a single serving for yourself and our fridge is still pretty bare. That's ok though. I think the hardest thing of this whole situation is that Landon's car is broken and he's thinking it will be a better idea to just get a new one than fix his old one...again. So considering he can't really afford a car right now, he's biking to work, which is giving him crazy strong calf muscles (which he LOVES:) and he's saving beaucoup dollars on gas, but that mean's I have to get creative for how to actually GET the furniture I need. Lauren's really nice and willing to help me out, seeing as she has a car, but hers is pretty small. Luckily, Bryant lent his car to Landon yesterday (which is an awesome SUV, good story, another time) and we used it to pick up my bed which was REALLY nice. So now I'll just have to be slightly creative for the rest of my stuff. I'll figure it out...somehow.
So the real reason I posted this was to say sit tight and stay tuned. The other night I wrote some poetry, which I literally haven't done in over a year, but something came over me and it just kind of happened. I wanted to put it on here, but unfortunately, we don't have internet at our house yet. So this is the second time I have come to RoCo with the intention of putting it on here and forgetting to bring my notebook. Fml in a small way.
However, I really would like some feedback on these poems (3 total) as they are the first I have written in a long time. I used some writing exercises as a springboard and then things just started happening. Exciting, right? So the first is from this exercise called Angel/Devil where you take a poem that's already written (by you or otherwise) and try to write the exact opposite of it, hence the angel/devil name. I haven't yet decided whether I'll put up the angel version from which I drew my devil poem. I'm kind of thinking maybe not, because it might be distracting, since I don't particularly care for feedback on that one. The second is a cynical bit on a particular book. If you know anything about that book, you'll recognize it. If you don't, that's fine. You'll be blissfully unaware. The third is another exercise. I don't remember what it's called, but you use the first line from another poem (famous or not) for your starting line, and go from there. I don't know if that equals plaigerism, but I'm hoping not, because it's a great springboard; you can go a COMPLETELY different direction than what's originally written. So stay tuned for those. I'm not sure when exactly I'll get them up, but hopefully soon.
On another note, I'm rethinking the direction this blog will take. I think it will become much more of a writing blog, looking for any sort of feedback, than just me bouncing my random thoughts on here. I originally started it to document some of my adventures in Zion, but I left out some key things, like the Narrows, Cable Mountain, Angel's Landing, the RATTLESNAKE, etc. I think I remembered to recount the accidental heatstroke incident, although I guess every case of heatstroke should be accidental. Sometimes redundancy is completely pointless which redundancy sometimes is. :)
Anyway, writing. Creatively. That's the plan. With the occasional rant. Comprennez? Alrighty, stay tuned!
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
shoes, etc.
I LOVE Tom's Shoes. They are SO comfortable and they are kind of expensive, but worth the price. You're essentially paying for two pairs of shoes. For every pair you buy, they give a pair to someone in need. Cool, right?
So I learned about Tom's Shoes from this random guy at church, and then I started spotting them around town and as soon as I bought a couple pairs, I started to discover this entire culture around these shoes, that I ended up becoming a part of because I bought some. I started noticing people who had them, either in pictures or in person.
Now I have to admit I'm a pretty judgmental person in general. I think that takes roots in my conservative christian background. But what I started to do was like reverse judgmentalism. I would see someone who had Tom's Shoes and automatically know they were AWESOME! I felt this instant kinship with other people who had Tom's Shoes because it was like we were all in this together. We were all buying these shoes for poor kids and that made us friends.
I started doing that with people who had Chacos too. Except you don't help poor people with Chacos. It just means you're moderately outdoorsy and willing to spend money on shoes, or a rich poser, or like me, have a friend who is a canyoneering guide and can get them for you for 50% off (I'm a pretty serious hiker too). But when I hike now, I totally judge people. This is what I look for:
-chacos or hardcore hiking boots, two very different kinds, but both pretty hardcore kinds of hikers
-camelbaks or nalgene(sp?) bottles same here, two different but both hardcore brands
-bandanas. I have no idea why I look for this one, I just happen to wear one myself, but I think I'm a little bit of a poser cause I just wear it around my neck
-how large their pack is, if they even have one. Good hikers prepare well for long hikes. You don't take 2 12 oz water bottles on a 10 mile hike
-time of day. The best hikers leave super early in the morning (5-7:30 am) because most scenic hikes in the summer have quite a bit of sun exposure. Now this one is flexible depending on location. But here in the desert, you know the common tourist from the seasoned hiker just depending on what time of day they're out. Me and Sharon started up Angel's Landing at 7:20 and beat most people and, for the most part, didn't have to deal with the sun beating down on us/dehydration/heat stroke.
Isn't that wild? I mean, that last one actually makes some sense, but I am SO judgemental! I also just happen to respect road bike riders who happen to have sweet old school style road bikes. Bonus points if they are wearing Tom's Shoes WHILE biking ON THEIR WAY to farmer's market. That's another one: buying locally/organically/vegetarian/farmer's market. Weird right? I just respect people more because of where they shop/what that eat.
Why the heck do I judge people by such arbitrary standards? Why do I care? And yet Landon doesn't really do any of those things and I love him most. Why? (well duh, because he's just amazing and wonderful:)
So there you have it. I judge and respect people based on what they wear on their feet, form of transportation, hiking standards, and food/water standards.
I don't know about you, but that seems pretty pathetic to me.
And my goal this summer was to become more genuine. I think part of that would be to judge people based on character. I would like to think I actually do that, but I can't be sure. I guess the best plan would be not to judge at all, but everybody does, and you know you'll end up judging some way or another. So how do you determine a non-judgmental way to judge?
So I learned about Tom's Shoes from this random guy at church, and then I started spotting them around town and as soon as I bought a couple pairs, I started to discover this entire culture around these shoes, that I ended up becoming a part of because I bought some. I started noticing people who had them, either in pictures or in person.
Now I have to admit I'm a pretty judgmental person in general. I think that takes roots in my conservative christian background. But what I started to do was like reverse judgmentalism. I would see someone who had Tom's Shoes and automatically know they were AWESOME! I felt this instant kinship with other people who had Tom's Shoes because it was like we were all in this together. We were all buying these shoes for poor kids and that made us friends.
I started doing that with people who had Chacos too. Except you don't help poor people with Chacos. It just means you're moderately outdoorsy and willing to spend money on shoes, or a rich poser, or like me, have a friend who is a canyoneering guide and can get them for you for 50% off (I'm a pretty serious hiker too). But when I hike now, I totally judge people. This is what I look for:
-chacos or hardcore hiking boots, two very different kinds, but both pretty hardcore kinds of hikers
-camelbaks or nalgene(sp?) bottles same here, two different but both hardcore brands
-bandanas. I have no idea why I look for this one, I just happen to wear one myself, but I think I'm a little bit of a poser cause I just wear it around my neck
-how large their pack is, if they even have one. Good hikers prepare well for long hikes. You don't take 2 12 oz water bottles on a 10 mile hike
-time of day. The best hikers leave super early in the morning (5-7:30 am) because most scenic hikes in the summer have quite a bit of sun exposure. Now this one is flexible depending on location. But here in the desert, you know the common tourist from the seasoned hiker just depending on what time of day they're out. Me and Sharon started up Angel's Landing at 7:20 and beat most people and, for the most part, didn't have to deal with the sun beating down on us/dehydration/heat stroke.
Isn't that wild? I mean, that last one actually makes some sense, but I am SO judgemental! I also just happen to respect road bike riders who happen to have sweet old school style road bikes. Bonus points if they are wearing Tom's Shoes WHILE biking ON THEIR WAY to farmer's market. That's another one: buying locally/organically/vegetarian/farmer's market. Weird right? I just respect people more because of where they shop/what that eat.
Why the heck do I judge people by such arbitrary standards? Why do I care? And yet Landon doesn't really do any of those things and I love him most. Why? (well duh, because he's just amazing and wonderful:)
So there you have it. I judge and respect people based on what they wear on their feet, form of transportation, hiking standards, and food/water standards.
I don't know about you, but that seems pretty pathetic to me.
And my goal this summer was to become more genuine. I think part of that would be to judge people based on character. I would like to think I actually do that, but I can't be sure. I guess the best plan would be not to judge at all, but everybody does, and you know you'll end up judging some way or another. So how do you determine a non-judgmental way to judge?
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